40 Days of Compassion

After staring at the computer for an hour last night trying to think of something to write for my 40 Days peoples, I decided to wrap out. I was exhausted, not feeling particularly well and unresponsive to all of my old tricks for breaking through writer’s block. It wasn’t happening.

“Til the morrow,” I yawned.

Cut to 100.3 The Sound blasting through my alarm clock speakers. After rising and washing, I sit to meditate, but find myself powerless to quiet the unabating noise mind. I was bombarded by negative memories, worries, imagined fantasies. Unable to bring myself to enough of a focus for contemplative prayer, I decided to shift to an entreaty directly from my lips to Hashem’s ears.

I confronted the fact that as of late, my faith has felt met with interference, as if i’ve been engulfed within a thick cloud. I asked for guidance in life and strength for my spirit.

After a few moments of prayer, I felt a powerful jolt of energy throughout my body, mind and spirit.

After spiritually reconnecting so forcefully, I became aware that this seemed like the first time I’d seriously prayed since the previous morning. I mean, I’d said quick prayers before lunch and dinner, but I allowed myself to simply plow ahead without a spiritual thought in my head or in my heart, for that matter.

So I am left here with two choices:

a) Beat myself up for going on autopilot for like twenty-four hours

OR

b) Humbly accept God’s compassion for me and jump back in the captain’s chair

“I’ll take B for 500, Alex.”

I concluded my prayer and opened my eyes to find myself bathed in direct sunlight from my bedroom window. I couldn’t help but jump up, start my computer and tell you all about it.

p.s. Sorry about the pilot metaphors, I’m not sure where that came from. At least I managed to avoid a lame daily double joke there at the end.